TGIF, RG2E Peeps!
If you want to start out the weekend full of laughs, here’s one of my fave ways to do it…chat with my friend and fellow author Barbara Silkstone…and treat yourself to one of her Ebooks that’s FREE today only!!!
You know you’ve passed a certain point in life, when your granddaughter asks to interview you for a school project, and the subject of the interview must be someone who has led an interesting life – that phrase alone can make you feel ancient.
I curled up in the bean bag chair in Ashley’s room. She was perched on her bed with a notebook on her lap and a pencil in her hand. My grandmotherly censors were alert to any answer that might get me in trouble with MOM.
Ashley is an avid reader, and so this interview would feature my writing adventures. “Where did you grow up and what were some of your earliest memories?” she asked me. A pretty sophisticated question from a ten-year old reporter. 🙂
“I was born in New Jersey where you are issued a peculiar sense of humor at birth.” I quipped. “Some of my earliest memories were translating the UNTOUCHABLES radio show from English to Polish for my grandmother who wouldn’t own a television but adored her old Philco radio. She loved to listen, but did not speak English. I even translated the punches, gunshots, and groans.”
My granddaughter enjoyed the image of my translating old picture-less action sagas. She jotted her reporter notes at a rapid pace and then cleared her throat. “Who were your earliest influences and why?” I feel as if I’m being interviewed by Terry Gross on NPR.
I wondered if Ashley would recognize either of my childhood icons. “Lucille Ball and the Road Runner,” I answered.
She looked at me, trying to determine whether I was serious or teasing. “Yes, really, Sweetie. I thank them both for my can-do attitude. I developed a belief that no matter how tough things were, if you kept your sense of humor you would get to dance the final rumba with Ricky or if the anvil fell on your noggin, you would recover.”
Ashley chuckled. I was surprised my little Pulitzer-winner-to-be got the humor, but she did.
Encouraged by her laughter, I kept on talking. “Most of my fourth year was spent in our hall closet attempting to turn into a black panther. I was unsuccessful. Devastated, when a kindergarten classmate told me that the panther plan would not work, I ran away from home. Upon my return, I set about a new career as a professional majorette.”
“Wait. Wait!” Ashley laughed as she slipped off the bed.
Grandchildren make the greatest audiences, whether they are reporters or just looking for one more childhood tale from the olden days. And what grandparent can resist letting their progeny know about the innocent pranks they pulled in the times when practical jokes were not in violation of someone’s civil rights and a good laugh might be the only consequence?
I sat forward in the bean bag and crossed my jeaned legs. “One of my fondest memories took place in kindergarten.” Ashley’s eyes glisten with excitement. She stops writing.
“I would sneak down to the older girls locker room, while they were in outdoor gym class. I would scramble their shoes and then triple-tie the laces of the miss-matched shoes. I would then return to my class with a sense of a trick-well-played, savoring the panic I imagined took place when the bell rang. I did this repeatedly throughout my first school year and went undetected.”
The idea of such an outrage being pulled off without discovery was amazing to a child raised with surveillance cameras as an everyday fixture. The pure joy of working a prank undetected was butterfly-freedom! She laughed and laughed.
“I credit my can-do attitude to the success of that early escapade,” I tell her. “I figured as long as I didn’t hurt anybody, it was okay to make people laugh. I imagined they all got some fun memories out of that adventure.”
Ashley scoots onto the floor and sits facing me. “Do you have a really funny memory you can share with my readers?” She asks in a professional tone.
“One of my funniest memories was in the seventh grade; when I published an unauthorized class newspaper. Our nun was very strict and would not have given her approval if I had asked, so I didn’t. I wrote and published – underground. My devoted girlfriends diligently hand copied my original newsletter and circulated the copies. We didn’t have copy machines in those days.” Ashley looked at me, surprised. I felt my covered wagon circling.
“My newsletter contained an advice column based on Dear Abby, school news, and a cartoon. THE ST. STAN’S NEWS survived six issues, at which time Sister Irma discovered my newspaper and sat on it. She literally sat on it in all her black robed splendor. I was forced to stand at her desk and beg for my news to be returned to me.”
Ashley gasped at the thought of facing down a real live nun. She had seen them in old movies, and could only imagine the power they possessed.
“I detected a slight smile as Sister Irma whacked me with her ruler. That was my first review and it wasn’t that painful. Not like three stars or less.”
“What was the first book you published?”
I was waiting for her to sneak in that question.“You know I am not allowed to tell you about that book until you are twenty-one.”
“But, I’m a reporter. Besides, Mom says I can know about your book when I am sixteen,” she said, importantly.
“But your Dad says, twenty-one, and you are still ten.”
“Just tell me what it’s about? For my readers.”
“It’s all about men and love and honor.”
“Yuck. Mushy stuff.” Ashley said. “Never mind. Thank you for this interview, Babci.”
I hug the reporter and she hugs me back. Someday, perhaps my story will be part of her portfolio. Perhaps.
Meantime, you can download my “forbidden” book (It’s FREE on Amazon today only!!!):
The Adventures of a Love Investigator, 527 Naked Men and One Woman
FREE today only; normally $3.99
With love and laughter,
Barbara Silkstone is the best-selling author of Criminally Funny Fables series that currently includes: The Secret Diary of Alice in Wonderland, Age 42 and Three-Quarters; Wendy and the Lost Boys; Zo White and the Seven Morphs; Cold Case Morphs; and London Broil.
For further giggles and a touch of true fiction try: The Adventures of a Love Investigator, 527 Naked Men and One Woman.
Silkstone’s writing has been described as “perfectly paced and pitched – shades of Janet Evanovich and Carl Hiaasen – without seeming remotely derivative. Fast moving action that shoots from the hip with bullet-proof characterization.”
Barbara Silkstone loves to hear from her readers.
You can write to her at: firstname.lastname@example.org
Blog: Barbara Silkstone http://bit.ly/M2Cs7Q
Barbara Silkstone’s Amazon Author’s page
I just luuuvvv your stories and anecdotes, Barb! Thanks sooo much for sharing and for the FREE Ebook too! U LMAO Rock, my friend!!! 🙂
The Best of RG2E Reading Wishes — D. D. Scott, RG2E Founder